STARTING OVER CAN BE OVERWHELMING
Are you feeling lost or stuck in your life? Maybe you’ve hit a rough patch or experienced a setback. Whatever the reason, starting over can be daunting.
But don’t worry, in this episode of the Daron Earelweine Podcast, he’s sharing three powerful steps to help you rebuild and start again. These practical tips will help you navigate the ups and downs of rebuilding your life.
So if you’re ready to take the first step towards a brighter future, tune in to our episode, “Rebuild: 3 Steps For Starting Again.”
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VIDEO TRANSCRIPT
We’ve talked about it here before. I’ll say it probably a thousand more times. Should is a word full of full of shame. Okay. So don’t shame on yourself. Don’t shame on your friends. It doesn’t help. Don’t shame on your kids. Take it out of your life. You could. It’s one-word change, shame it’s amazing the compassion and the courage that it begins to give you. When you say, in a way, I could be further where I am, I could have started rebuilding six months ago. I could there now you’ve empowered yourself, right, with compassion, to move towards courage, to begin to rebuild whatever is left, whatever is broken.
TAGLINE: Created on purpose and for purpose.
Hey, guys. Welcome back to the Daron Earlewine podcast. So honored that you’ve downloaded this episode. And we’re moving into a little bit of a new season here on the podcast. If you’re watching on YouTube, you can see that a little different situation kind of deconstructed. And it’s it’s not just an example where we’re actually rebuilding the whole set and everything we do with the podcast. And so this podcast episode is literally called Rebuild. And so if you’ve never gone over to YouTube and subscribe to the channel just as a great favor to me, I’d love if you did that.
After you finish this episode, go subscribe to the YouTube channel. Or maybe, hey, if you’re not driving right now, safety first. Come on. All right. But if you’re not driving, maybe I just push pause here on on Apple, Spotify, wherever you listen. And we know that about 90% and that’s really not a great math situation. You guys know I’ve failed math twice in college. I didn’t do the actual percentages, but the vast majority of you guys and girls all listen to the audio podcast. But just so you know, we are on YouTube every Wednesday gets released and you get a chance to kind of maybe be a little closer to the action.
Watch the podcast there. So if you’re watching right now, you see that it’s different. And and here’s the deal. In life, we talk a lot about finding purpose, obviously, here on the Daron Earlewine podcast. And there’s something it’s a great challenge, right, to build something, to start something the first time to find the courage and and the tenacity. Right. To go and start and build something. If you’ve lived longer than like maybe five years.
Right? You realize that oftentimes the the life cycle of whatever it is that you’re building or that you’re creating comes to a point where it either dies. We just we just spent 17 weeks talking about the death of a dream. Right? And even if something doesn’t die, a lot of times you just get to a place where you get stagnant. You get to a place where you’re doing the same thing, the same ways. Maybe you’re just feeling a little bit dry in creativity. Or it could be that something has ended.
You have had a death of a dream, something you were building has fallen apart. It’s stopped, it’s died. And it’s at that point that a lot of people get stuck. Because if it’s if it takes one level of courage, creativity, tenacity, perseverance, whatever, to actually build something, I think it can take about ten times that to rebuild. So what I want to do today is just give you three quick points that could be hopefully encouraging, hopefully kind of informative to you to actually embrace the rebuilding process, whether it’s of your life, whether it’s a business, whether it’s a ministry, a relationship, whatever it may be to embrace the reality of rebuilding.
Because whether you’re there now or if you’re not there now, I just want to tell you, I’m not a prophet, but it’s coming. Right. And I would say also there can be times where it may not be forced upon you. Like, for instance, right now we’re coming off one of the greatest growth seasons we’ve had in podcast history. I guess you could say. We’ve we’ve had so many new folks joining us here in the part of the podcast community through the last series of The Death of a Dream, folks reading the book, people putting together small group book studies and getting together and going through the content.
Quick little commercial for you. Just so you know, here, real soon we’re going to actually release a small group curriculum that will be audio and video. That’s going to be the content that was a part of the podcast with extra discussion questions. If you want to go through the book, The Death of a Dream as a group. So that’s that’s some content coming soon. Just a little commercial for you, but we’ve had a lot of growth with the podcast. We sit down with our team here in the room, in our studio with Darren Cooper and PJ Towle that are part of our creative and marketing and all the whole team here at Blackbird Mission.
And over the past couple of weeks, we’re like saying, What’s next, right? And we came to the place of, Hey, you know what? We’ve had this set, we’ve had this vibe for a while. I think maybe it’s time to rebuild. It’s time to restructure what we’re doing and and see where it takes us. And I’ll just be honest, that was a little challenging. Darren Cooper does such a phenomenal job with filming and audio and all the stuff we do. We get so many compliments from you guys about how. Good. The podcast, look how good it sounds. And so it’s not like it’s like broke. It wasn’t like people are like, “Dude, podcast sucks.”
“Sounds like you’re tin can, right?” Wasn’t like, “you know, looks terrible. What, are you in somebody’s garage?” Right. No, we’re in an office. But it was working, but we wanted to get to a place so you know what? What are we leaving? Left undone. What are the new ideas that we could step into? And so that’s what we’re doing. It feels awkward, right? This one, we came in here and started just taking everything down. And here’s the crazy part. Right now. We’ve got kind of a sketch in our brain of how we think the new set is going to look and what we’re going to do. But it’s not figured out like we don’t have a just an absolute perfect, ironclad, airtight plan of this is what we’re doing forward.
So there’s a there’s a little of it’s there’s a level of liminal spaces, right? We’re in a liminal space. Okay. And it feels weird, but it feels good. Okay. And so here’s what I want to hit you guys with just a three points. I have to use three. I thought about using two, then I thought about four. But I was like, What am I doing right? I’m a communicator. I’m kind of a pastor. We got to go with three points at all time. So here’s the first thought I want to hit you with. When you get to a place. If you’re needing to rebuild, here’s what you got to do. You got to release the past. You got to release the past. And that is such a challenge.
And it’s a challenge. On whether it’s been a great, successful past or whether it’s been painful. Both places, it’s a challenge to let go of what has been because there’s comfort in it. You’re used to it, you know it. And so there’s a comfort zone, whether it’s success or failure that you have to let go of. Okay. One of the coolest stories I love, U2’s my favorite band. If I could come back as someone if reincarnation was true, right? First order of business for me.
I know I should say Jesus, but he’s God, so that doesn’t really work. But I’d be Bono 1,000%. I want to be Bono. And I’ve been reading his new book, Surrender. If you haven’t read it, go get it. Actually, don’t go get the book. Get the audiobook, because Bono actually reads it to you. Warning it is a 20 hour book. It literally is 20 hours, 40 songs that has shaped their life, their band and all the stories behind it. I love the book so much. I’m literally listening to it again. So yes, in one year I will spend 40 hours listening to Bono tell me U2 stories, but currently favorite book I’ve ever read.
And one of the coolest U2 stories for me dates back to right at the at the end of the 80s. In fact, it was December 30th, 1989. I’ve always loved this quote. I’ve always loved this moment. And so they’re doing these shows in Ireland as a way to kind of end this tour in the decade in the year and this on December 30th. So it’s almost the end of this decade, right at the end between a couple of songs. This is what Bono says. He says, “this is just the end of something for U2.”
“And that’s why we’re playing these concert and we’re throwing a party for ourselves and for you. It’s no big deal. It’s just we have to go away and dream it all up again.” They’re going to this next song and then the 80s end. And if you know you to history, they go away for a couple of years and the next album they come out with is Auchtung Baby. Completely different, sound complete. I mean, they change so much about U2 to that point, but it begins becomes something that propels them into an amazingly next level of success in the 90s.
But that phrase, I’ve always been drawn to that phrase, right? Where he just says, “we’ve got to go away and dream it all up again” and that might be right where you are. You think about a band like you to write worldwide acclaim, millions of dollars, millions of albums, millions of fans, and they had kind of their sound, their thing. It would have been so easy for them to say, Listen, don’t screw with the recipe, right? Just get back in the studio, do what you’ve always done and make it happen.
But there was something in them telling them it’s time to release the past. It’s time to let it go and it’s time to go dream it up again. And that might be right where you are. And it’s liminal space, may feel uncomfortable, but it’s what you have to do. Because you have greater opportunity and success in your future and you don’t have to stay in the failure of your past or whatever it is. So if you’re sitting right now in your life and you’re looking around like we are here at the studio and you’re like, Man, it’s just it’s kind of pieces.
It’s kind of strewn all over the place. Like, I don’t really know where I’m going. That’s okay. Maybe you just need to go away for a little bit and dream it up again. Right. And it’s okay if it doesn’t feel comfortable. I don’t know who said this, quote, I don’t have a reference for it, but. Right. The most comfortable place on earth. You know what it is? Cemetery, Right. It’s quiet. It’s peaceful. No one’s moving around. You got a nice little comfortable coffin you’re in, and you just stay there for ever. That’s not what you want for your life.
Your life. Your future is not going to be a cemetery type of life. You’re moving forward into the new things and new opportunities that God has prepared in advance for you to do. Okay. Another really, really cool quote I like about this idea of releasing the past comes from C.S Lewis. He says this, “You can’t go back and change the beginning. But you can start where you are and change the ending.” I love the picture that Scripture gives us, right? That that Jesus is the author and perfecter of our faith.
And so I want you to embrace that idea, right? You have you’re looking at the pages of your life. You can’t go back and change the beginning. You can’t go back and change anything. Right? Life is a one way street. And so right now you have a page where you’re looking at it and you may not like the the circumstances of this current page. But figuratively, here’s what I want you to think about doing to start flipping forward. Four, five, six, 50 pages. Guess what they are? They’re blank. The future is yet to be created. And when you join with God, the author and perfecter of your faith, he can begin to write this new story, this next chapter.
But to do that, you have to release the past. And there’s two elements I think they’re going to be necessary for you to step in to release. In the past, there are these forgiveness. And compassion. You know what? There’s a third one. Courage. Forgiveness, compassion and courage. So there’s got to be forgiveness when you when you release the past. You may need to forgive someone that has caused the pieces of your life to fall apart. We talked about that a lot, right? In the Death of a Dream series, forgiveness is an absolute necessary un…
There’s no conversation around this, right? Non-negotiable. We have to forgive. Sometimes that’s about forgiving ourself as well. I think that’s actually oftentimes more difficult than forgiving someone else. The next thing you need, you’re going to need compassion. You’re going to need compassion on yourself for, you know, in that forgiveness process, but also the emotions, the struggle that you may have to actually get the momentum going to rebuild. Here’s what’s not going to help you in releasing the past in this rebuilding process, being critical in condemning of yourself for where you are and where you, quote unquote, should be.
Okay. We’ve talked about it here before. I’ll say it probably a thousand more times: “should” is a word fill of full of shame. Okay. So don’t should on yourself. Don’t should on your friends. It doesn’t help. Don’t should on your kids. Take it out of your life. You could. It’s one word change, but it’s amazing the compassion and the courage that it begins to give you when you say, You know what? I could be further where I am. I could have started rebuilding six months ago. I could there now you’ve empowered yourself, right, with compassion, to move towards courage, to begin to rebuild whatever is left whatever is broken.
So you’ve got to release the past and that’s where you want to go. Second part I want to get you is this you have to embrace an abundance mindset once again. You have to embrace an abundance mindset. Here’s what I noticed. For me, I noticed a lot of people is when we get into these liminal spaces, when we get to a place where we’re trying to figure things out is oftentimes we begin to believe that the universe is a universe of scarcity.
Right. I had this success, but I must have caught just lightning in a bottle. There’s no way I could ever do this again. This was my one good idea. I’m never going to have a good idea. That was my one best friend. Now that that relationship’s gone, I’ll never find a friend again. I’ll never find someone that loves me again. I’ll never. Whatever it is. Because life is scarce. There’s a scarcity of opportunities, the friendships of success, whatever it is. And I’m done right. I cashed in my ticket to the chocolate factory. You know, no more Willy Wonka.
I’m not going to get in the in the Chocolate River. It’s not happening. There’s no Loompa loompas, you know what I mean? Or that one. Is that the guy or the girl? There’s never a pump somebody in purple or something like that. Who is it? Who’s in the purple Violet? Is it a girl? She blows. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know that that’s there, too. So anyway, thank you, PJ and Coop for the Willy Wonka reference. Not in the notes. Let’s get back to the script. Here’s the deal is life is not scarce. You want to know why? Because God is your source, right? And he is the most creative being in the universe because he created the universe.
I love what McManus says, right, is that “creativity is the natural result of spirituality.” As you’re able to release the path to God, as you’re able to embrace his forgiveness for you, his compassion for you, his courage in you. Right? What that begins to bring you to a place is, is where you realize I’m connected to the most spiritually. I’m connected to God. And if his spirit is within me and he says, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Right? Well, I think that means I have access to all of the creativity of the universe.
This world, this life, this universe is a world, is a universe of abundance. God has more new ideas and more opportunities for you than you could ever wrap your mind around. And so we have to step into this idea going, You know what? Like, I don’t have to just find that one last little teeny gold nugget that might be there. I just need to embrace what God’s doing in and through me and believe, right? Here’s the faith piece. Believe that there’s an abundance out there waiting for me. That mindset change could do everything for you because when you’re connected to God, it’s amazing where he’ll lead you.
Got a cool story that I discovered from Einstein. Albert Einstein. Pretty brilliant dude. And this story, right? It goes back to when he was actually studying the theory of special relativity, Right? Which a breakthrough that changed understanding of life and science and everything. Right. It was a transformational understanding. Well, the story is really, really cool. It’s back in 1905. Okay. In the spring, early spring, 1905. He’s 26 years old. 26-year-old Einstein. You know what’s kind of stupid when I think of Einstein is seeing with the crazy hair, all gray hair.
So when I was researching and found this story, I was like, Oh, wait, Einstein was doing stuff. And he was 26 like in my brain. I thought like probably all like 76-year-old Einstein is when it really broke out for him. But he’s studying this, the theory of relativity. He’s 26, okay? And he spent the evening going over the ideas with his friend. They’re looking for this. They said they’re looking for the missing piece of the puzzle in and one of his biographies, right, it says “he returned home in despair, feeling he would never discover the true laws based on known facts.”
Okay. “There’s no record of how late he went to bed that night, but he woke up the next morning in great agitation, as if a storm had broke loose in his mind.” Here’s the interesting thing. They’re looking for a piece of a puzzle of the theory of relativity that no one has ever thought of. Right. So the idea of, like, scarcity could have been big. They’re like, we don’t even know really what we’re looking for. A missing piece of the puzzle here. It’s scarce. There’s only one of them. We don’t know what to do. I’m 26 years old. I’m trying to to rebuild people’s understanding of relativity and gravity and the universe.
And here’s what it says. This is really, really cool. It says that he woke up and he said, right. “He had finally tapped into God’s thoughts and tuned into the master plan of the universe.” His quote came down to this, “Ideas come from God.” I think that’s absolutely true. Here’s the crazy thing about Einstein. They don’t even think he had any kind of belief in the idea of a personal God. Right. But it was his metaphorical way of speaking.
It says, Now, here’s the interesting thing, things are about this. Is they talk about in the following weeks after the revelation that he had about the theory of relativity. It says that in his research on what he was doing after that point, “It says it’s as if he was possessed. He had put ideas on paper filling 31 pages of notes.” And in this it talks about this. This is interesting. It says that “in his final paper, it was strangely free of footnotes or references, as if the inspiration had indeed, if not come from God, some otherworldly source.”
He didn’t really even believe in God. But when he began to tap into this abundance of new ideas that no one, literally no one had ever known this he broke this idea of the theory of relativity, but he had to come to a place, even as an agnostic, going, you know what ideas come from God. I don’t know where this is coming into coming from, but I’ve tapped into something in the universe that seems limitless. I want you to embrace that same kind of thought. You’re looking at your life, your business, your ministry, your church, your marriage, your parenting, whatever it may be.
I want you to know that when you tap into a relationship with Jesus, that all ideas come from God. He thought this whole world up, right? It says that God spoke the world into being. Well, where do you get your your words? Your words are first thoughts. We come from the imagination, the creativity of God. And if you’re connected to him, you do not have. Scarcity of opportunity and ideas. There’s an abundance and you have to embrace that idea. Here’s some scripture on this that I thought was really, really good.
James Chapter one, verses 17 through 18 says, “every thing good comes from God? Every perfect gift is from him. These good gifts come down from the Father who made all the lights in the sky. But God never changes like the shadows from those lights. He is always the same. God decided to give us life through the true message he sent us. He wanted us to be the most important of all that he created.”
Let that sink into you. Wherever you wherever you are, whatever you’re going through, whatever you need to release, whatever you need to rebuild. You are the most important things in God’s universe. His child. You’re created in his image, connected to him, his spirit, bringing you to life. And you have an abundance of ideas just waiting for you to receive your life is not scarce. Last thought. I would hit you with this. Okay. This can be a tough one. Okay? But it’s. It’s. It’s. It’s truth. It’s this.
Don’t rebuild alone. Don’t rebuild alone. I think one of the things that can happen in success or failure. Okay, let’s start with failure is it begins to erode our trust in others, especially if someone did something that has hurt us in the process. Right. Forget people. How about this? Forget institutions, right? Right now. And in Christianity, we’ve got a lot of deconstruction that’s happening right in our culture in general.
We distrust power, we distrust authority. And in that distrust, you know, and some of it can be well founded, right? When you see untrustworthy actions. Right? Or you see injustice, one of the first things that can make you do is begin to distrust authority in institutions. And what that can do is it leads us to isolation. That is not the way of God. If you want to know how the enemy or how the devil wants to actually limit and eventually destroy your life, he’s going to isolate you. He’s going to keep you alone in a place where you won’t trust anyone and it will not go well for you.
So if you’re going to rebuild, right, you’ve got to release the past. You’ve got to embrace this this abundance mentality. But you have to trust you can’t rebuild alone. You go back to the very first pages of the Bible where it says that God created the heavens in the earth. And you realize in that that God in himself didn’t do it alone. He’s a relationship, right? When God says, Let us right, Father, son, Holy Spirit, make man in our own image, God in himself didn’t build alone.
He didn’t rebuild alone. When you look at the scriptures, when it talks about that the father was in the son reconciling the world to himself on the cross, Jesus didn’t do it alone.
Don’t rebuild alone. Now, does that mean you just invite everybody onto your rebuild team? You know, you put it out there on Twitter. Hey, looking for some people to rebuild my life. Anybody taking applications? No. You got to be selective. You got to say, God, give me wisdom. And here’s here’s a piece that I would say for you, too, is you begin asking God to send to your life people of peace for your rebuilding, as God as Jesus sent out that the 12 and he sent out the 72. Right? He told them to go out and find people of peace. It’s something that has guided my life.
It’s a way it’s the way I find people that that I should share the gospel with. It’s the way I find opportunities for our ministry. It’s how I find opportunities to build our team is I ask God to open my eyes to the people of peace He’s bringing into my life. Here are three things to look for is you’re looking for people of peace. OK? Number one, they’re open to you. Meaning that they they like you, right? They like being around you. How do you find people at peace? Pay attention to people that it seems interesting, but they just seem to be in your sphere, often seem at the grocery store.
Then somebody brings them up, then you bump into them at a concert, then they’re at church. You’re like, Man, I see Bill all the time. Why is he in my life so much? Could be person to peace. Second thing is this They’re open to what you have to say and that they’re open to it. If you’re talking about the gospel or you get into a conversation, you begin to trust them about this rebuilding process. Is there not somebody that’s like, okay, yeah, thanks for sharing, See you. Right. But they’re drawn to it. They’re curious about what you have to say. The third thing you look for is this. And this is sometimes a lot of times the tipping point for me is that they serve you in some way.
What does that look like you’re at? At dinner? They’re like, hey, I got it. They’re your neighbor. They bring your trash cans up for you, right? Something small or something big. They serve you in some kind of way. Begin to ask God for people of peace, for you to to bring into this rebuilding team so you don’t do it alone. I think you look at tons of scriptures, right? I was actually just listening to first Corinthians 12 this morning as Paul is going through and talking about, you know, spiritual gifts and he’s talking about the body of Christ. You know, if you’re if you’re not, you know, don’t get sad if you’re an ear because you know that that you’re not a mouth or like the different parts of the body that have more honor and whatever is we need variety, right? You look at the understanding of that.
We’re just one part of this whole of what God’s doing. And so you need others to actually fill that out. We talk a lot here in the podcast about Ephesians chapter four, verse 11, right? The Apostles, prophets, evangelists, shepherds and teachers, the FIVEFOLD ministry. You’re only one of those five. But as you’re rebuilding your life, your ministry, your marriage, whatever it may be, you need a community around you where you have a team, you have a tribe, right? That that represents those five. And you need to step into an understanding. I’m only one fifth of the team.
I need to actually see my life rebuilt through the ideas of abundance. Right. That God has for me. There’s just so many scriptures. And I thought all about also about the 12 disciples, right? Like it wasn’t like Jesus was like, Bro, I’m just going to do this on my own. He brought together 12 guys to build the kingdom. Okay, Don’t rebuild alone. And I think as you look at that, I want you actually to to actually start there. I think oftentimes when we’re in a rebuilding season of life, we get obsessed with what. What am I doing? What am I rebuilding? And we’re trying to get that understanding of the what I want to encourage you to start with the who.
Right? If you’re alone right now in a process.
Take some time and don’t be obsessed about what you’re going to do, what it’s going to look like, how long it’s going to take, whatever. First and foremost, start with who is the number one building block? Jesus. Right? Release the pass to him. Make sure that he is absolutely 100% who you’re abiding and trusting in. Let that be the foundation because it’s got to flow out of that relationship. That’s where you’re going to get the courage. That’s where you’re going to get the humility. That’s where you’re going to get the forgiveness. That’s where you’re going to get the ability to understand compassion to yourself.
So your first who is Jesus and then begin asking him to bring you these people of peace. And as you begin to see a community and it could be 3 or 4 people coming around you to form your rebuilding team, they will help shape and actually empower the what that’s coming. So start with the WHO before you obsess about the WHAT. Those are the thoughts I have for you as you rebuild. As we rebuild. I’m excited. We come back here in a couple of weeks with with a new series.
We’re going to talk about renewal. And it’s going to be coming out here in a couple of weeks, a new podcast series. The set is going to look different, right? I’m going to look different. Dye my hair, actually going to shave it off. Going bald for a. I’m just kidding. I’m not doing that. We’re going to have a different set. It’s going to be cool. Same kind of content for you. And I don’t know. I don’t know what’s going to look like. I know what’s going to happen. But here’s what I know. We’re releasing the past, right? Everything’s messed up in here. We’re not sure what it’s going to look like. Right? I’m in a process where I’m not freaked out about it.
I’m embracing the abundance of it. I know God has more ideas than we can actually execute coming our way. And what I’m stoked about is the amazing team that God has brought into my life, into the ministry. I couldn’t trust Coop and PJ anymore, and we’re going to come together and we’re going to create something that I hope brings a lot of faith and hope and love in your life. So, hey, we’d love to hear from you. We always do appreciate those of you that do reach out to us, whether it’s through Twitter, through all the socials. Just search my name on social, whatever from you’re on, we’re on there.
Or you can always email me Daron@blackbirdmission.com and you can text us 317-550-5070. I’d love to hear from you and what your rebuilding process looks like. Maybe some questions you have from this content. We’re here to help and walk this journey with you. So appreciate you guys. Thanks for downloading this episode. And until we see you again in the future, remember these three things? God’s for you, not against you. He’s near you, not far away, and he’s created you on purpose and for purpose. Talk to you guys next time.